Saturday, July 9, 2011

The dog ate my homework

I have to share something a bit funny. If we don't laugh, all we do is cry and then what do you have? Dehydration. (Ok, not really, but whatever.)

As I mentioned before, after the first biopsy, while waiting for results, we were convinced that the dog had injured my mom's breasts a year ago when he jumped up on her and nearly knocked her out. We were sure the beast's giant paws had caused scar tissue which made the mammogram come back irregular and we would then be able to tell the dog, Issac, that it was all his fault.

Of course, the result wasn't scar tissue so our plan completely backfired.

Now to really get this, you must know a little about my mom and dad's dog. Issac is a 200lb or more black lab. Ok, perhaps 200lbs is exaggerated. But he is a HUGE black lab. It seems anything my mother cares for for any length of time, gets fat. Her kids, her dogs. . .you get the idea.  Issac is a smart dog and very sweet. But he is VERY energetic and well, as much as I know she wouldn't want me to say it, Issac is out of control. He can listen, when he wants and feels you are worthy of telling him what to do. But the rest of the time, Issac does what HE wants to do. Fortunately, he is crate trained, so their house is still standing. 

Oh and Issac is extremely spoiled (as dogs should be) but spoiled to the point that my father will sit and hold his bone while Issac chews on it. Yes, dogs are capable of holding their bones on their own and chewing them, but Issac likes it this way. He also thinks he is a lapdog and will nearly tip a recliner over as he leaps on to your lap.

So, when we found out that our blaming the biopsy on Issac fell through, we had to come up with some other way to blame Issac. Immediately my mom turns and looks at Issac and says, "you know, Ize Guy, there ARE cancer sniffing dogs out there. You obviously aren't a cancer sniffing dog. . ." and of course our banter, through tears and laughter, consisted of "Poor Ize guy failed in cancer sniffin' school."

So, Issac still gets to take the blame since he didn't sniff out the cancer. It's ok, he likes it when we talk to him. As long as we do it in that one voice, no matter what we say, he thinks it's great.


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