I truly believe we have angels all around us. They may be a close friend who at just the right moment provides information that changes your life. Perhaps they send us small signs which tell us everything is going to be ok.
Today was a rough day for my mom. The diagnosis from yesterday hit her pretty hard. Don't get me wrong, my mom is still very positive that she will beat this. She will be a survivor. Emotions about the situation should never be confused with negativity - as they are two very, very different things. She will have rough days. I will have rough days. We both still very much hold hope that she will be well, she will beat this beast and life will be "normal" once again.
Since the diagnosis, there have been a few signs that were extremely comforting and meaningful. The first came on Saturday. Mom was sitting on her front porch and a hummingbird came up on her porch. In all the time she has lived in the house. hummingbirds have not been frequent flyers. Yet, this guy came and lingered for a short while. Shortly after, a bright red cardinal sat on the palm tree in the flowerbed right in front. Again, cardinals are common birds but my mom doesn't really have anything in front of her home to attract birds and they haven't been around before this day. My grandmother loved birds. Her favorite bird was the red cardinal. She had kitchen mugs with cardinals, she always liked to sit and watch them. She liked hummingbirds and used to put hummingbird feeders out so she could watch them. I truly believe my grandmother sent my mother the birds that morning to let her know she's still with her. She's still thinking of her. She's praying (I mean, she kind of does have a direct line since she's there and all). It's little signs that provide huge amounts of comfort - if we just take the time to watch for them and listen to them.
I also received some amazing information from a large group of friends. They recommended a new primary care physician for my mother to see. Through a series of events, we were able to have mom's appointment bumped up to see her today. The appointment was fantastic. The doctor is SO GOOD. She had already reviewed my mother's results prior to the appointment. She gave some wonderfully encouraging words but also acknowledged that my mom will have good and bad days. She gave her a prescription for Xanax for the bad days, to help her get through and remain positive. She gave her tons of information.
It was through my group of friends that we found this doctor - she is the perfect fit. Without having these folks in my life we wouldn't have this new doctor. We wouldn't have known to go to the surgeon she will be seeing next week. We wouldn't have the best oncologist in town on the case. People are in our lives for a reason. I hope, one day, I can be someone else's angel. I hope I can do as much for someone else as these people have done for my family.
Today, also a bright spot, a package came for my mother. It was a tote from a group called The Lydia Project which was requested by a very dear friend. The kindness and thought that went into requesting this gift, which will lift spirits throughout this journey was received with tears of joy and swelling of the heart. It is a faith based group and the messages were so very, very clear. Have faith - love is around you. To the person that sent this, you know who you are, thank you so much. Your kindness and love were received today in a very powerful way and you made a difference in brightening the spirit of someone who is very scared. So thank you, again.
I think it is only appropriate to share this video. It was part of the television show So You Think You Can Dance a few seasons ago. I remember when I watched it the first time I cried. It touched me deeply, however, at the time I hadn't a clue as to how deep and meaningful it truly would be.
Please, please, if you have not already, schedule your mammogram today. It just may save your life.